Every morning in October, our skeleton named Joe tells dad jokes on our front porch.
He tells funny jokes to make kids smile all through the month of October. All the jokes are kid friendly and punny for the whole family.
Joe loves to see the kids smile and laugh, and he knows that Halloween is a time for family fun. So, if you’re looking for some good, clean Halloween jokes, be sure to ask Joe! He’s always happy to share a few laughs with the kids.
Thanks, Joe, for bringing some humor into our lives!
Q: Why didn’t the zombie go out on Halloween? A: He felt ROTTEN!
Q: Why didn’t the zombie go out on Halloween?
A: He felt ROTTEN!
A woman wanted to marry a ghost… I don’t know what POSSESSED HER!
A woman wanted to marry a ghost…
I don’t know what POSSESSED HER!
Q: Why do skeletons go to barbecues? A: They like spare RIBS!
Q: Why do skeletons go to barbecues?
A: They like spare RIBS!
Q: Why don’t skeletons make good surgeons? A: They don’t have the STOMACH for it!
Q: Why don’t skeletons make good surgeons?
A: They don’t have the STOMACH for it!
Q: Why aren’t vampires very good at art? A: Because the only thing they like to do is draw BLOOD!
Q: Why aren’t vampires very good at art?
A: Because the only thing they like to do is draw BLOOD!
Q: Why do ghosts like to go into bars? A: Because of the BOOOOOS!
Q: Why do ghosts like to go into bars?
A: Because of the BOOOOOS!
Q: Why don’t skeletons play church music? A: They don’t have ORGANS!
Q: Why don’t skeletons play church music?
A: They don’t have ORGANS!
Q: What did the skeleton say to his girlfriend? A: I love every BONE in your BODY!
Q: What did the skeleton say to his girlfriend?
A: I love every BONE in your BODY!
When ghost go shopping, they are bargain HAUNTERS!
When ghost go shopping, they are bargain HAUNTERS!
When a vampire kisses you, it’s a pain in the NECK!
When a vampire kisses you, it’s a pain in the NECK!
Q: How do monsters like their eggs? A: TERROR-fried!
Q: How do monsters like their eggs?
A: TERROR-fried!
Q: Why does the ghost always buy new books? A: Because he goes through them very quickly!
Q: Why does the ghost always buy new books?
A: Because he goes through them very quickly!
Q: Why didn’t the coffee bean go to the Halloween party? A: Because it was GROUNDED!
Q: Why didn’t the coffee bean go to the Halloween party?
A: Because it was GROUNDED!
Q: What kind of underwear do mummies wear? A: Fruit of the TOMB!
Q: What kind of underwear do mummies wear?
A: Fruit of the TOMB!
Q: What song do vampires hate? A: You are my SUNSHINE!
Q: What song do vampires hate?
A: You are my SUNSHINE!
Q: What is a ghost’s favorite meal? A: SPOOK-ghetti!
Q: What is a ghost’s favorite meal?
A: SPOOK-ghetti!
Q: Who do witches call for breakfast while on vacation? A: BROOM service!
Q: Who do witches call for breakfast while on vacation?
A: BROOM service!
Q: What is a zombie’s favorite thing to eat? A: BRAIN food!
Q: What is a zombie’s favorite thing to eat?
A: BRAIN food!
Q: What does it take to become a zombie? A: DEAD-ication!
Q: What does it take to become a zombie?
A: DEAD-ication!
Q: What do you call a skeleton that sits around all day? A: A lazy BONE!
Q: What do you call a skeleton that sits around all day?
A: A lazy BONE!
Q: What do you call a napping pizza? A: A PIZZZZZZZZZZZZA!
Q: What do you call a napping pizza?
A: A PIZZZZZZZZZZZZA!
Q: What room in a house do ghosts NOT need? A: A LIVING room!
Q: What room in a house do ghosts NOT need?
A: A LIVING room!
Q: Why did Dracula run out of the Italian restaurant? A: They put GARLIC on his pizza!
Q: Why did Dracula run out of the Italian restaurant?
A: They put GARLIC on his pizza!
Q: What medicine do ghosts take for a cold? A: COFFIN drops!
Q: What medicine do ghosts take for a cold?
A: COFFIN drops!
Q: When do skeletons laugh? A: When you tickle their funny BONE!
Q: When do skeletons laugh?
A: When you tickle their funny BONE!
Q: What do moms dress up as on Halloween? A: MUMMIES!
Q: What do moms dress up as on Halloween?
A: MUMMIES!
Q: What do you call a villainous pizza? A: A PIZZA work!
Q: What do you call a villainous pizza?
A: A PIZZA work!
Q: Why couldn’t the skunk call for pizza? A: His phone was out of ODOR!
Q: Why couldn’t the skunk call for pizza?
A: His phone was out of ODOR!
A rabbit used to come up to my front yard every day for food, but hasn’t shown up in a week. Now it’s just SOME BUNNY I used to know.
A rabbit used to come up to my front yard every day for food, but hasn’t shown up in a week. Now it’s just SOME BUNNY I used to know.
Q: Why did the vampire need mouthwash? A: He had BAT breath!
Q: Why did the vampire need mouthwash?
A: He had BAT breath!
Q: Why are graveyards so noisy? A: Because of all the COFFIN!
Q: Why are graveyards so noisy?
A: Because of all the COFFIN!
Q: Why do people get into the pizza business? A: To make some DOUGH!
Q: Why do people get into the pizza business?
A: To make some DOUGH!
Q: Why are all of superman’s costumes so tight? A: They’re all size “S”
Q: Why are all of superman’s costumes so tight?
A: They’re all size “S”
I wanted to tell a skeleton pun but I don’t have the GUTS for it!
I wanted to tell a skeleton pun but I don’t have the GUTS for it!
Q: What do you call a witch’s garage? A: A BROOM closet!
Q: What do you call a witch’s garage?
A: A BROOM closet!
Q: How does a scarecrow drink his juice? A: With a STRAW!
Q: How does a scarecrow drink his juice?
A: With a STRAW!
Q: What type of TV’s are in a haunted house? A: Wide SCREAM TVs!
Q: What type of TV’s are in a haunted house?
A: Wide SCREAM TVs!
Q: Why do jack-o-lanterns have wicked smiles? A: Because they just had their BRAINS scooped out!
Q: Why do jack-o-lanterns have wicked smiles?
A: Because they just had their BRAINS scooped out!
Q: What did the pirate wear on Halloween? A: A pumpkin PATCH!Q:
Q: What did the pirate wear on Halloween?
A: A pumpkin PATCH!Q:
Simba was walking so slowly so I told him to MUFASA!
Simba was walking so slowly so I told him to MUFASA!
Q: Why did the skeleton climb up the tree? A: Because a dog was after his BONES!
Q: Why did the skeleton climb up the tree?
A: Because a dog was after his BONES!
Q: What is a ghost’s nose full of? A: BOOOOOOgers!
Q: What is a ghost’s nose full of?
A: BOOOOOOgers!
Q: What do female ghosts use to do their makeup? A: VANISHING cream!
Q: What do female ghosts use to do their makeup?
A: VANISHING cream!
Q: Where did the ghost go on vacation? A: Mali-BOOOOO!
Q: Where did the ghost go on vacation?
A: Mali-BOOOOO!
Q: Why did the skeleton cry at the dance? A: He had NO body to BOOGIE dance with!
Q: Why did the skeleton cry at the dance?
A: He had NO body to BOOGIE dance with!
Q: Why don’t mummies take time off? A: They are afraid to UNWIND!
Q: Why don’t mummies take time off?
A: They are afraid to UNWIND!
Q: Why are skeletons so good at chopping down trees? A: They’re LUMBAR-jacks!
Q: Why are skeletons so good at chopping down trees?
A: They’re LUMBAR-jacks!
Q: How are false teeth like stars? A: They both come out at night!
Q: How are false teeth like stars?
A: They both come out at night!
Q: What happened when the ghost cheated on his homework?
A: The teacher saw right through him!
Q: What happened when the teacher ran out of glue?
A: It was a sticky situation!
Q: Why are teachers so awesome?
A: Because they have A LOT of class!
Q: Why don’t bees drink coffee before they go to school?
A: Because they get too BUZZED!
Q: Why do I bark every morning before I go to school?
A: Because I’m the teacher’s pet!
Q: Why did the skeleton bring a ladder to school?
A: He wanted a HIGHER education!
Q: Why did the skeleton put his protractor in the freezer?
A: Because it was 180 degrees!
Q: Why did the skittles go to the school?
A: They wanted to be smarties!
Q: What does a skeleton drink in dance class?
A: TAP water!
